Iron Man (2008, Third-Person Action Movie Game, 360) – 3/10 review

Iron Man Iron Man (2008) Weapons-inventing genius Tony Stark has a change of heart and decides to rid the world of weapons he believes are in the wrong hands by not telling anyone he’s invented a perfect AI, building the most brilliant and destructive battle suit (i.e., weapon) of all time and going on a genocidal rampage across the world. No, hang on, that didn’t come out right. 3/10 Well, at least it’s easy to determine what’s wrong with this movie game: the flying controls are near unusable. Remarkably, the camera, aiming and movement controls are different when doing just about anything. Therefore, the only people who will ever play this game and get something out of it are those after a big lump of gamerscore. Add to that the unspeakable ugliness of the game and "movies," and the lazy difficulty and you have a legitimately worthless entertainment product. That sold nearly three million copies worldwide. This Iron Man game contains violence. Classified 16+ by PEGI. The game is only suitable for persons who have reached the age of 16 or over.. Classified Violence by PEGI. Game contains depictions of violence.

Duplicity (2009, Industrial Espionage Romance Movie) – 3/10 review

Julia Roberts: Claire Stenwick Clive Owen: Ray Koval Tom Wilkinson: Howard Tully Paul Giamatti: Richard Garsik Producer: Jennifer Fox Producer: Kerry Orent Producer: Laura Bickford Writer: Tony Gilroy Writer: Tony Gilroy

Duplicity (2009) Two ex-secret agents try to con a duelling pair of big businessmen out of $40 million. 3/10 This probably sounded really clever in Tony Gilroy’s head but he doesn’t manage to get it down on paper or up on screen. His principle saviour is Clive Owen (Julia Roberts looks ill with her sunken eyes) who makes most of his scenes feel fun even when they’re not and you’re not terribly interested in what’s going on. The opening credits are a bit of a hoot as two middle-aged men have a handbags-at-dawn fight in super-super-slo-mo (150 frames-per-second) but that’s the only interesting thing in a transparently-plotted (who’s fighting who at the start), woefully unconvincing, generally useless movie. This movie contains mild adult dialogue and brief violence and sensuality. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult.

Agatha Christie Marple 4.02 Murder is Easy (2009, Mystery TV) – 3/10 review

Julia McKenzie: Miss Marple Writer (Original Novel): Agatha Christie Camilla Arfwedson: Rose Humbleby Tim Brooke-Taylor: Dr Edward Humbleby Anna Chancellor: Lydia Horton Benedict Cumberbatch: Luke Fitzwilliam David Haig: Major Hugh Horton Shirley Henderson: Honoria Waynflete James Lance: Dr Geoffrey Thomas Lyndsey Marshal: Amy Gibbs Steve Pemberton: Henry Wake Jemma Redgrave: Jessie Humbleby Hugo Speer: James Abbot Margo Stilley: Bridget Conway Sylvia Syms: Lavinia Pinkerton Russell Tovey: PC Terence Reed Writer (Screenplay): Stephen Churchett Producer: Karen Thrussell Director: Hettie MacDonald Stephen Churchett: Coroner

Agatha Christie: Marple 4.02 Murder Is Easy (2009) Miss Pinkerton shares a train carriage with Miss Marple and excitedly tells her that she is on her way to Scotland Yard. Before Miss Pinkerton can arrive, however, she is pushed down an escalator which, to the audience’s great surprise, kills her. Miss Marple wonders why Miss Pinkerton wasn’t pushed in front of a car and decides to go to Wychwood to investigate. 3/10 Murder might be easy (there are a whopping six squeezed in here) but generating convincing dialogue, situations and atmosphere is something that ITV is still finding very difficult. As the book’s original hero (Luke Fitzwilliam) is drawn into the story by chance, there is no problem with dropping Miss Marple into the story via the same mechanism but, unlike Agatha Christie, the director and writer don’t cover up the clunkiness with charm, wit, characterisation, insight or intelligence. Additionally, they change the motive of the murderer (not enough SPOILER incestuous rape in Christie’s novel), undermine the meaning of the title, remove the challenge of battling the perfect murderer and make SPOILER Miss Pinkerton’s murder needlessly unlikely. If you’re going to change something, change it for the better. Please. P.S.: Because of the (added) political campaigning elements, it reminds me an awful lot of, I think, a Midsomer Murders episode but I don’t know which one. This Agatha Christie: Marple episode contains adult dialogue and unpleasant scenes. Links Previous episode: A Pocket Full of Rye

7 Seconds (2005, Movie) – 3/10 review

Director: Simon Fellows Wesley Snipes: Jack Tuliver Tamzin Outhwaite: Kelly Anders Pete Lee-Wilson: Alexsie Deobia Oparei: Spanky Georgina Rylance: Suza Director of Photography: Simon Fellows Writer: Martin Wheeler Martin Wheeler: Cole

7 Seconds (2005) Ex-Delta Force dude Jack Tuliver has become a master thief (it’s the law or something) and his latest target is a $20 million casino cash heist but it’s complicated by the presence of a $65 million Van Gogh in the loot meaning the stakes are even bigger than he thought. Because, you know, no-one cares about $20 million in cash. 3/10 It’s vaguely exciting and never loses the interest but star Wesley Snipes is probably the weakest link in the movie as he disdainfully trudges his way through his lines and action. His half-heartedness (look at his face on the DVD cover) is made more obvious because he occasionally remembers he is actually a highly capable actor but his talent only comes through in snippets. Co-star Tamzin Outhwaite is much more interesting on-screen and strides around with rather more purpose and charisma until she is sidelined for Snipes’ action climax. Outhwaite’s the reason I rented and she is fine but is capable of being great in something much better. This movie contains strong adult dialogue, sexual swear words and extreme and graphic violence, extremely unpleasant scenes and sex scene, female nudity. Classified 15 by BBFC. Suitable only for persons of 15 years and over.

Enchanted (2007, Movie) – 3/10 review

Director: Kevin Lima Writer: Bill Kelly Amy Adams: Giselle Patrick Dempsey: Robert Philip James Marsden: Prince Edward Timothy Spall: Nathaniel Idina Menzel: Nancy Tremaine Rachel Covey: Morgan Philip Susan Sarandon: Queen Narissa Narrator: Julie Andrews Kevin Lima: Pip in New York

Enchanted (2007) On the day she is to marry her fairy-tale prince, Andalasian commoner Giselle is pushed into the real world by the wicked Queen Narissa. Prince Edward arrives to rescue her but true love may have other plans. 3/10 So the movie opens with a chap who takes a mentally-disturbed babe back to his apartment and then insists his six-year-old daughter spend the night in his bed. Yeah, you try that. Kevin Lima’s fantasy romance has a heart-warming reputation but that wasn’t what I felt. The morals are: don’t get married after a day (dump him and marry someone else after knowing them for a day), think only of yourself (if you follow your heart it’s fine to steal someone’s else fiancée; in fact, the fiancée will appreciate it) and spend obscenely using the real magic of the credit card; at the time, of course, the Disney company motto. The only positive aspect is James Marsden’s Prince Edward with his fabulous floppy hair, irresistible grin and boundless enthusiasm ("thank you for taking care of my bride, peasants"). Alan Menken’s songs and score are notably bland, especially with the clear echo of Menken’s classic scores for The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast. Watch them and this back-to-back and weep for Walt. This movie contains fantasy violence, mild fantasy peril. Classified PG by BBFC. Parental Guidance.

Smallville 8.14 Requiem (2009, TV) – 3/10 review

Tom Welling: Clark Kent Allison Mack: Chloe Sullivan Justin Hartley: Oliver Queen Writer (Characters’ Creator) Superman: Jerry Siegel Writer (Characters’ Creator) Superman: Joe Shuster Developer for Television: Alfred Gough Developer for Television: Miles Millar Kristin Kreuk: Lana Chris Gauthier: Winslow Scott Writer: Holly Henderson Writer: Don Whitehead Director: Michael Rohl

Smallville 8.14 Requiem (2009) Oliver Queen reveals a previously unsuspected bomb-proof-ness when he is the only survivor of a blast at a LuthorCorp board meeting where he was announcing his hostile takeover. He knows who the bomber probably is but strongly suspects that Lex is behind the attack and uses the bomber to lead him to Lex so that he can kill him. Meanwhile, Clark and Lana enjoy some super-sex (dang, another bed broken) but Lex has plans for them also. 3/10 Chloe shocks us to our very core by knocking on Clark’s door before walking in immediately anyway. It’s not like Clark and Lana were in the middle of super-sex. Oh. Anyway, the reason for last week’s eye-bulging Super Lana storyline is partially justified this week with a meaty moral dilemma. However, so broken is the chemistry between Kristin Kreuk and Tom Welling and so mechanical their performances (you can actually see him thinking about which eyebrow to move) that we simply couldn’t care less about the moral dilemma and subsequent drama for these two characters. The Michael Rosenbaum look-alike and sound-alike (two different actors) are very close but I can’t remember why Lex is in the state he is. Aside from the writers having to remove Lex from all active plot duty. Links Previous episode: Power Next episode: Infamous

Minder 11.01 Better the Devil You Know (2009, TV) – 3/10 review

Shane Richie: Archie Daley Lex Shrapnel: Jamie Cartwright Writer: Tim Loane Writer (Series’ Creator): Leon Griffiths Producer: Sean O’Connor Director: David Innes Edwards

Minder 11.01 Better the Devil You Know (2009) Taxi driver Jamie Cartwright is about to have life turned upside-down when he meets local mover-and-shaker Archie Daley who is, as usual, up to armpits in trouble. 3/10 Cheap, worthless attempt to relaunch the series with all new characters. While Shane Richie seems to have all the right words, he simply doesn’t have the right attitude or charisma that made George Cole’s Arthur Daley an instant icon. Lex Shrapnel has absolutely no charisma and a silly walk to boot. It also looks like it was put together for a fiver and filmed on (an admittedly high-end) camcorder but it’s the all-pervasive blandness that is the critical element. There is absolutely no reason to watch or make any more of this. This Minder episode contains violence.

LEGO Bionicle Heroes (2006, Game, 360) – 3/10 review

Director: Jon Burton

LEGO Bionicle Heroes (2006) Stop the island of Voya Nui succumbing to the evils of Piraka who has used the Mask of Life to transform the wildlife into aggressive creatures. Use the masks of the Toa Inika and harness their powers to put Piraka and his minions back in their place. 3/10 Strangely, no-one seems to have told Traveller’s Tales that you can’t see what you’re doing. Which is something of a problem in a video (from the Latin "to see") game. The game design is identical to the companies’ highly successful LEGO Star Wars and one suspects that the over-the-shoulder view was introduced to make it look different and appeal to slightly older children (that is, it looks like a shooter instead of a platformer). Unfortunately, in conjunction with the already unappealing characters and pig-ugly graphics, this has made the game very unfriendly to use and not fun to play despite the strong and addictive game design buried within. This game contains extended projectile violence.

The Terminal (2004, Movie) – 3/10 review

Director: Steven Spielberg Writer (Screenplay): Sacha Gervasi Writer (Screenplay): Jeff Nathanson Writer (Screenplay): Andrew Niccol Writer (Screenplay): Sacha Gervasi Producer: Steven Spielberg Tom Hanks: Viktor Navorski Catherine Zeta-Jones: Amelia Warren Stanley Tucci: Frank Dixon Chi McBride: Mulroy Diego Luna: Enrique Cruz

Terminal, The (2004) Viktor Navorski is travelling to New York from Krakorzia but en route a coup in his country means that his passport and entry visa become invalid. Not able to fly home or enter the United States he is told that he must stay in the International Flight Lounge until the situation is resolved. To everyone’s surprise, instead of bolting for the door, he does exactly as he is told… 3/10 Unconvincing. And that’s being nice. Despite three credited screenwriters the script has not had its bugs ironed out and this undermines the ever-brilliant Tom Hanks and the super-slick Spielberg coating. The fact is, this is two-minute news fluff and is here horribly stretched to a lifeless two hours. It’s pretty safe to say that this mistaken mess will be Spielberg’s worst and most worthless ever film. This movie contains adult references and mild sensuality. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult.

Black Bart (1975, TV) – 3/10

Louis Gossett: Black Bart Millie Slavin: Belle Buzzer Noble Willingham: Fern Malaga Steve Landesberg: Reb Jordan Developer for Television: Michael Elias Developer for Television: Frank Shaw Writer (Series’ Creator): Andrew Bergman Writer: Michael Elias Writer: Frank Shaw Director: Robert Butler Executive Producer: Mark Tuttle Producer: Michael Elias Producer: Frank Shaw Producer: Robert Butler

Black Bart (1975) Black Bart is the highest-paid black Sheriff in the country. Well, he’s the only one but he’s struggling to ingratiate himself with the townsfolk, especially the Mayor and his errant son Curly. 3/10 Curious unaired footnote to comedy classic Blazing Saddles. Someone, perhaps understandably, thought a small-screen spin-off would be a sure thing but that same person overlooked the fact that Blazing Saddles was funny. Lou Gossett is not known for his comedic brilliance but it doesn’t help that he’s given a script without gags and, to be fair, he, uniquely among the cast, shows useful charisma. Aside from that, this is awful. And is it just me, or does Millie Slavin look like a dude? This television contains adult dialogue and violence.

Lady in the Water (2006, Movie) – 3/10

Writer: M. Night Shyamalan Producer: M. Night Shyamalan Director: M. Night Shyamalan Paul Giamatti: Cleveland Heep Bryce Dallas Howard: Story Bob Balaban: Harry Farber Jeffrey Wright: Mr. Dury Sarita Choudhury: Anna Ran Cindy Cheung: Young-Soon Choi Freddy Rodriguez: Reggie Bill Irwin: Mr. Leeds Jared Harris: Goatie Smoker Mary Beth Hurt: Mrs. Bell M. Night Shyamalan: Vick Ran

Lady in the Water (2006) After investigating some nocturnal splashing in the apartment pool, caretaker-with-a-past Cleveland Heep slips over and awakes in his room in the company of a rather under-dressed and otherworldly young woman. She calls herself Story and Heep realises that he must protect and help her return to her own world at any cost. 3/10 Impenetrable, uninteresting and unconvincing fairy tale. It’s pretty well directed and acted but the writing is incoherent and clumsy and completely buries any worthwhile message M. Night Shyamalan wanted to deliver. That said, the one-sided muscle-man is an agreeably insane idea but it is James Newton Howard’s music that is the only element of a consistently high quality. This movie contains inferred violence, unpleasant scenes and inferred non-sexual nudity. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult.

Smallville 8.01 Odyssey (2008, TV) – 3/10

Tom Welling: Clark Kent Allison Mack: Chloe Sullivan Erica Durance: Lois Lane Aaron Ashmore: Jimmy Olsen Cassidy Freeman: Tess Mercer Justin Hartley: Oliver Queen Writer (Characters’ Creator) Superman: Jerry Siegel Writer (Characters’ Creator): Joe Shuster Developer for Television: Alfred Gough Developer for Television: Miles Millar Phil Morris: Martian Manhunter Alaina Huffman: Dinah Lance / Black Canary Alan Ritchson: Arthur Curry / Aquaman Ari Cohen: Writer (Screenplay): Todd Slavkin Writer (Screenplay): Darren Swimmer Writer (Story): Brian Peterson Writer (Story): Kelly Souders Director: Kevin G. Fair

Smallville 8.01 Odyssey (2008) Lex, now power-less Clark and Chloe are all missing but all have teams looking for them. Lois is looking for Chloe, new LuthorCorp CEO Tess Mercer is looking for Lex and Oliver Queen, Black Canary and Aquaman are looking for Clark. 3/10 Typical for the opening show of a Smallville season, this resets everything back to normal inside forty minutes without much care or thought. The more you think about it, the worse it becomes. The producers tick off another sexy outfit for Erica Durance to wear (French maid) but it’s a lone high-, well, high-ish-point. Chloe’s new power (super-IQ) does make begrudging sense given the character’s history but that doesn’t stop it being indelicately dropped into the show. Surprisingly, Smallville bedrock Tom Welling looks entirely unconvinced throughout but let’s hope that, now he has his powers back, he starts to enjoy himself in what is reported to be the final season. This Smallville episode contains strong violence, gory and unpleasant scenes. Links Previous episode: Arctic Next episode: Plastique

Ocean’s Twelve (2004, Movie) – 3/10

Director: Steven Soderbergh Writer: George Nolfi Producer: Jerry Weintraub Writer (Original Characters): George Clayton Johnson Writer (Original Characters): Jack Golden Russell George Clooney: Danny Ocean Brad Pitt: Rusty Ryan Matt Damon: Linus Caldwell Catherine Zeta-Jones: Isabel Lahiri Andy Garcia: Terry Benedict Don Cheadle: Basher Tarr Bernie Mac: Frank Catton Carl Reiner: Saul Bloom Elliott Gould: Reuben Tishkoff Robbie Coltrane: Matsui Eddie Izzard: Roman Nagel Cherry Jones: "Molly Star"/ Mrs. Caldwell Jeroen Krabbe: van der Woude Julia Roberts: Tess Ocean

Ocean’s Twelve (2004) When Terry Benedict catches up with Ocean’s Eleven he demands repayment plus interest within two weeks or he’ll have them all killed. The team get back together to start stealing more stuff to pay Benedict off but a third party has yet to reveal himself. 3/10 Fully bad sequel to the original better-than-expected remake of the rose-tinted remembrance of a 60’s original. A line or two are nice, the cast seem to be enjoying themselves (except Julia Roberts) and Catherine Zeta Jones looks impossibly lovely but it’s difficult to pull out anything positive of importance. The heists are spectacularly unconvincing and the plot is transparent and / or breathtakingly stupid. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult.

Chain Reaction (1996, Movie) – 3/10

Producer: Arne Schmidt Director: Andrew Davis Keanu Reeves: Eddie Kasalivich Morgan Freeman: Paul Shannon Rachel Weisz: Lily Sinclair Fred Ward: FBI Agent Ford Kevin Dunn: FBI Agent Doyle Brian Cox: Lyman Earl Collier Writer (Story): Arne Schmidt Writer (Story): Rick Seaman Writer (Story): Josh Friedman Writer (Screenplay): J.F. Lawton Writer (Screenplay): Michael Bortman Producer: Andrew Davis

Chain Reaction (1996) Eddie Kasalivich is a machinist working on a project to create pollution free energy from water. One night the laboratory is blown up in spectacular fashion, destroying eight city blocks, but Eddie discovers that the explosion was rather more than an accident. 3/10 After the high-quality career blip of The Fugitive director Andrew Davis returns to more typical form with this spectacularly unconvincing action thriller. While he keeps things moving swiftly throughout and showcases some nice stuntwork (especially on a Chicago bridge) it’s not enough to even vaguely disguise the silliness of the story and the tiresome dreadfulness of the script. To their credit, the actors perform reasonably well; everyone seems to be taking their roles very seriously and Freeman is acting as if he is in a much better film. Oddly, the climax’s big special effect is shown after the end credits. On a side note, I am sure J.D. from Scrubs would be delighted to see the Janitor get shot again as he did in Davis’ The Fugitive. This movie contains unpleasant scenes, violence. Classified 12 by BBFC. Suitable only for persons of 12 years and over.

The Interpreter (2005, Movie) – 3/10

Director: Sydney Pollack Nicole Kidman: Sylvia Broome Sean Penn: Tobin Keller Catherine Keener: Dot Woods Jesper Christensen: Nils Lud Yvan Attal: Philippe Executive Producer: Sydney Pollack Executive Producer: Anthony Minghella Writer (Story): Martin Stellman Writer (Story): Brian Ward Writer (Screenplay): Charles Randolph Writer (Screenplay): Scott Frank Writer (Screenplay): Steven Zaillian

Interpreter, The (2005) UN interpreter Silvia Broome overhears a planned assassination being discussed in the General Assembly Room (after hours, of course). Even though the authorities consider this somewhat unlikely (even a Hollywood movie would find this stretching credulity), they have to take all possible threats seriously and assign Tobin Keller to investigate. 3/10 Surprisingly incompetent would-be Hitchcockian / 1970’s political thriller whose professional sheen cannot mask the endlessly poor dialogue and plot. The uselessness extends all the way down to the prop department who deliver two of the worst photoshopped images in cinema history. Sydney Pollack paces things deliberately and it’s not boring, exactly, as it moves toward the ridiculous climax, just broken. This movie contains graphic gun violence, strong unpleasant scenes. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult.

World Trade Center (2006) – 3/10

Director: Oliver Stone Writer Based on the True Life Events of John & Donna McLoughlin and William & Allison Jimeno: Andrea Berloff Nicolas Cage: John McLoughlin Michael Peña: Will Jimino Maggie Gyllenhaal: Allison Jimeno Maria Bello: Donna McLoughlin Stephen Dorff: Scott Strauss Jay Hernandez: Dominick Pezzulo Michael Shannon: Dave Karnes Donna Murphy: Frank Whaley: Chuck Sereika

World Trade Center (2006) Two New York Port Authority policemen are trapped alive beneath the fallen World Trade Center. 3/10 Intrusive and clumsy feeling disaster epic. Despite being based on testimony and created with the input of those involved, it’s remarkably unconvincing aswell. Amazingly, not even Maria Bello’s eyes are convincing. There’s even a scene where three Americans don’t have a single mobile phone between them. Now make sure you go and watch United 93. This movie contains sexual swear word and extended peril and mild sexuality. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult. Available on DVD.

Mulan 2 (2004, Movie) – 3/10

Director: Darrell Rooney Director: Lynne Southerland Writer (Screenplay): Michael Lucker Writer (Screenplay): Chris Parker Writer (Screenplay): Roger S.H. Schulman Ming-Na Wen: Mulan B.D. Wong: Shang Mark Moseley: Mushu Composer (Lyrics) Original Songs: Alexa Junge Music Composer Original Songs: Jeanine Tesori

Mulan 2 (2004) Mulan and Shang have decided to marry but a mission to escort three princesses to conclude a marriage alliance with a neighbouring country that will guarantee peace and security may provoke tension that will drive a wedge between them. That and the malevolent scheming of Mushu who doesn’t want to lose his ancestral pedestal. 3/10 Despite decent new songs (though there’s only two), Mulan 2 degenerates from blandly competent to deliver a toe-curlingly negative and typically American movie message. The film’s moral is “your duty is to your heart” which is a pretty way of saying ‘be selfish.’ Therefore, every character in the movie thinks only of themselves and that, sadly commonplace, attitude is not something we should be passing on to our progeny. Mark Moseley provides a remarkable Eddie Murphy impersonation but gets nothing fun, funny or positive to say throughout the entire film. This sequel is, as with many Disney home video premiere’s, an offensive insult to the original movie. This movie contains violence. Classified U by BBFC. Universal: Suitable for All.

D-War (aka Dragon Wars) (2005, Movie) – 3/10

D-War Dragon Wars (2005) Every 500 years, er, a pair of super-giant snakes – one good, one evil – get the opportunity to consume the spirit of a 20-year-old woman who had been born with the tattoo of a dragon on her right shoulder. This allows the snake to become a dragon and become as powerful as, well, a super-giant snake probably. 3/10 Eye-brow-raisingly awful fantasy monster movie (the most expensive in Korean film history) with strong visual effects. The story and script, perhaps impressively, never cease to take the breath away with their incompetence; writer / director Hyung Rae-Shim never manages a single not-terrible line, even accidentally. There is also a notable lack of dragon wars in the movie with a climactic fight between a dragon and a snake proving to be the only appearance of a dragon. That said, the effects are good, the action editing is quite effective and I got a surprising kick out of seeing a Chinese-style dragon in CG, something I’ve never seen in any other movie. This movie contains fantasy monster violence against each other and against humans. Classified 12 by BBFC. Suitable only for persons of 12 years and over. Links Official D-War website

Smallville 7.16 Descent (2007, TV) – 3/10

Smallville 7.16 Descent (2007) Lex takes drastic steps to recover Lionel’s key. 3/10 Smallville is like the opposite of Nintendo DS’s Brain Training. This week sees yet more hilariously impossible computer work as Chloe magics photo detail out of nowhere because she has “mad CPU skillz.” That is an actual quote. However, it looks like we might have seen the end of the rubbishness of the Lionel / Jor-El story thread and that is good news. Clark and Lex get a good scene and while it is good that the show has decided on a definite direction for Lex this season (down, if you were wondering), it’s not terribly convincing. Michael Rosenbaum has looked bored all season and the spark and charisma he has brought to Lex is, perhaps appropriately, no longer there. This Smallville episode contains extremely unpleasant fantasy scene.

Smallville 7.09 Gemini (2007, TV) – 3/10

Smallville 7.09 Gemini (2007) Lex secretly gets Lois to write an ‘exposé’ on him, against Grant Gabriel’s wishes, but Lois finds herself the target of a mad bomber (he’s wired Chloe to blow) who wants to genuinely expose Lex. Clark returns from the fortress and has seriously changed his tune about Lex and wants to join up with Lana to put him behind bars. 3/10 The cast on the bomb-on-a-Chloe storyline do try their best but it’s in vain; that thread is shocking despite the interesting cloning angle and Jimmy Olsen furiously pondering why Chloe calls Clark in their emergency: “Is he going to dismantle the bomb with his great hair?” Clark and Lana get to follow the gloop, perhaps Milton Fine trying to regenerate, but that story doesn’t work any better. In fact, not a lot works in this episode including a ‘twist’ in the tale which makes no sense. This Smallville episode contains unpleasant scenes and sensuality.

Be Cool (2005, Movie) – 3/10

Be Cool (2005) A disillusioned Chili Palmer decides its time to get out of the movie business and decides to try his hand at the music business. 3/10 F. Gary Gray brings his total lack of style and absolutely no understanding of comedy to this entirely worthless sequel to the better-than-expected Get Shorty. He also manages to waste an impressive cast who, Vince Vaughn aside, do good work, especially Uma Thurman and Dwayne Johnson (when is someone going to give him a good movie?). This movie contains a single sexual swear word, mild swear words, frequent mild swear words in song lyrics, adult dialogue, abusive dialogue and extreme baseball bat violence, graphic violence, unpleasant scene of man set on fire and sensuality. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult..