Transformers: Age of Extinction (2014)
A Texas inventor buys a fully busted truck that was inside a derelict cinema and pulls a missile out of it that allows it to turn back into Optimus Prime but an inter-galactic bounty hunter, Lockdown, is working with the CIA to capture Optimus Prime and so the glistening, muscular inventor / robotics engineer / elite hacker and his good-looking daughter / really, really good-looking daughter / rally co-driver go on the run with Prime and end up saving the world. And there will be robot dinosaurs. The end.
This is an atrocious film on almost every level except visual effects and Mark Wahlberg. It would be a challenge to find more than a few subsequent lines that are coherent let alone compelling characters, involving storylines or comprehensible action sequences. Somehow, Wahlberg rises above all that and remains a quality, likable presence despite what the movie bafflingly puts him through. I don’t know what kind of secret sauce ILM keep back for Michael Bay but however Bay photographs his plates and however ILM’s artists up their game for him results in some utterly remarkable visuals: convincing, photo-realistic and extremely good-looking. Between them they produce the best visual effects explosions in the business; you cannot tell which explosions are real and which are not. Now, it would be accurate to state that the movie didn’t need to be good in order to fulfil it’s purpose – make money – but there was also no need for it to be this derisory.
This movie contains a single sexual swear word, bad language, strong violence, sensuality
Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult.
Cast / crew
Director and Executive Producer: Michael Bay
Writer: Ehren Kruger
Producer: Lorenzo di Bonaventura
Producer: Tom DeSanto
Producer: Don Murphy
Producer: Ian Bryce
Mark Wahlberg: Cade Yeager
Stanley Tucci: Joshua Joyce
Kelsey Grammer: Harold Attinger
Nicola Peltz: Tessa Yeager
Jack Reynor: Shane Dyson
Sophia Myles: Darcy Tirrel
Li Bing Bing: Su Yueming
Titus Welliver: James Savoy
T.J. Miller: Lucas Flannery
Peter Cullen: Optimus Prime
Frank Welker: Galvatron
John Goodman: Hound
Ken Watanabe: Drift
Robert Foxworth: Ratchet
John DiMaggio: Crosshairs
Mark Ryan: Lockdown
Reno Wilson: Brains
Ratchet & Clank: Into the Nexus (2013)
Ratchet, Clank, Kronk and Zephyr are transporting intergalactic baddie Zendra Prog to prison when her brother catches up to them and breaks her out. Ratchet and Clank wind up marooned on a nearby planet and have to catch Zendra and put her back where she belongs. However, they’re going to need help from an unexpected source.
Into the Nexus‘ constantly evolving gameplay features lots of toys, lots of fun and lots of quality shooting; there’s so much opportunity for majestic overkill. It helps that these adventures are always good-natured in tone with a friendly feeling between Ratchet and Clank, smack-talking henchmen who aren’t above receiving a good jump-scare and even a scene where someone keeps their word and goes to prison willingly. Nexus‘ antagonists Vendra and Neftin Prog are good value but no Dr. Nefarious. It’s such a shame that the frame rate doesn’t remain smooth; Ratchet and Clank really should be prioritising a 60 frames per second update yet Nexus doesn’t maintain 30. Though it feels impressively frenetic and remains playable, the 30 fps at best means that it is difficult to track anything on screen.
This game contains violence
Cast / crew
Ratchet: James Arnold Taylor
Clank: David Kaye
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
19,000 people fit into the new Barclays Center to see Jay-Z perform. This blog was viewed about 120,000 times in 2012. If it were a concert at the Barclays Center, it would take about 6 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.
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