Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) – 6/10 science-fiction action adventure movie review

Cast / crew Director: Michael Bay Writer Based on Hasbro’s Transformers Action Figures: Ehren Kruger Producer: Lorenzo di Bonaventura Producer: Tom DeSanto Producer: Don Murphy Producer: Ian Bryce Executive Producer: Steven Spielberg Executive Producer: Michael Bay Shia LaBeouf: Sam Witwicky Josh Duhamel: Lennox John Turturro: Simmons Tyrese Gibson: Epps Rosie Huntington-Whiteley: Carly Patrick Dempsey: Dylan Kevin Dunn: Ron Witwicky Julie White: Judy Witwicky Ken Jeong: Jerry Wang John Malkovich: Bruce Brazos Frances McDormand: Mearing Peter Cullen: Optimus Prime Hugo Weaving: Megatron Leonard Nimoy: Sentinel Prime

Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) Sam is struggling to find a place back in the real world but a secret that has been kept since the late 1960’s is about to erupt into his life and involve him in the fate of the world once more. Though no-one has anyway of knowing for certain, he suspects that some stuff might get blown up. 6/10 Restoring the fun to the franchise before going all serious for the Chicago-levelling third act but never achieving the greatness that the fantastically cool pre-credits sequence, awesome Buzz Aldrin cameo and Leonard Nimoy’s Sentinel Prime promise, Dark of the Moon is a Michael Bay movie that has several good moments. Unfortunately, it does devolve into a series of beautiful visuals featuring too many robots you frequently can’t differentiate around which the bullet-, missile-, concrete-, gravity- and crash-landing-proof Shia LaBeouf is hurled and thrown and dropped. If he ever wanted to destroy the world, there would be no way to stop him. This movie contains the obligatory sexual swear words to ensure the certificate and graphic and extreme violence by robots on humans, graphic and extreme robot violence and ‘hilarious’ homosexual misunderstandings, sensuality. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult. Links Previous: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

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Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009, Movie) – 4/10 review

Cast / crew Director: Michael Bay Writer: Ehren Kruger Writer: Roberto Orci Writer: Alex Kurtzman Producer: Lorenzo di Bonaventura Producer: Tom DeSanto Producer: Don Murphy Producer: Ian Bryce Executive Producer: Steven Spielberg Executive Producer: Michael Bay Shia LaBeouf: Sam Witwicky Megan Fox: Mikaela Bane Josh Duhamel: Major Lennox Tyrese Gibson: USAF Master Sergeant Epps Kevin Dunn: Ron Witwicky Julie White: Judy Witwicky John Turturro: Simmons Peter Cullen: Optimus Prime Hugo Weaving: Megatron Tony Todd: Fallen

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) Since the incident in Los Angeles, Optimus Prime and the Autobots have been protecting Earth from the Decepticons while Sam prepares to go to college. A shard of the Allspark, however, is discovered and Sam’s life is about to turn upside-down again. 4/10 If the first was a glorious mess, then this boring, fun-free sequel is just a mess. This is very much an idea-free zone with no clear plot, no clear character arcs and endless, meaningless, interchangeable action with apparently random robots that makes absolutely no sense. I think it takes supremely arrogant writers to write such random garbage because, if it were me, I simply could not stand the inconsistencies (in the franchise and within just this movie) and presence of baffling stereotypes spouting cut-and-paste dialogue from a collection of bad movie scripts. People need to stop employing Orci and Kurtzman and stop now. Michael Bay and his actors all put a lot of effort in but, aside from the fact that it frequently looks fabulous, it’s all wasted. This movie contains partial sexual swear words, mild swear words, adult dialogue and comic substance abuse and extreme mecha violence, extremely unpleasant scene and sexuality. Classified 12A by BBFC. Persons under the age of 12 must be accompanied by an adult. Links Next: Transformers: Dark of the Moon Previous: Transformers